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Eliters Newsletter
Issue Number 10
December 2003
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My First Eliters Christmas

I met ELITERS in Beginner Lounge 2 one day, and they are KRAZY people! I must have been a LUNATIC to join. But I must say it was ABITEOFLUCK, and it turned out to be a BARRELOFUN. My first Christmas with ELITERS is coming and I sure WANT to be with them. I can see it now: ST.NOCHLEHEAD (AKA Santa) dressed in that famous BIG_RED suit, everyone decorating that NEKKID Christmas tree, and its not looking so PEAKY anymore.

Everyone is drinking CHAMPAGNE and awaiting the Battle of the Sexes, in fancy style. Some great costumes on show such as BAMBI, a MERMAID, a ROBIN, captain HOOK, a couple of VIRGINS, (although Iím not sure if they're in fancy dress HAHA), a BLACK PANTHER, a WHITTY WOLF, and a FRISKY KITTY being followed by a TIGER'S SHADOW speaking DUTCH! How bizarre!! Some ANGELS dropped in from HEAVEN. Thatís just CRIMINALLY_INSANE! A BFG (big friendly giant) talking to a GORILA on a BIKE, that has to be the BONZIest thing I have ever seen.

OH_MY! What is WICKD doing under that GREEN mistletoe? FIRPIN heck, she is FLITTING her eyes at GREG. Will she resist TEMPTAION? Ooop's too late.

From outside, a FINCH with HOPE stares at MUFFINS on a SILVERY tray. Canít beat MAMAS home cooking! Its game time, will it be the ladies or men? Will it end like last week's, when double KINGS WON the game? Will an ACEEATER make an appearance? The NUCK_MASTER is wearing the GREENBERET again, it says ~~ Newís flash: Men will win Bos ~~. Keep dreaming, I think to myself. "Attention Eliterís do not feed him NOMORESUGAR! Or we may find him playing with a RUBBERDUCK or a BARBIE now wouldnít that be a site.

BURRrrrrrr, I wish SUMMER was here with hot SUNNY weather. Its cold in here! Send ELM out for WOOD for the fire so we all donít get sick, or make the MEDIC or the great DR_CHEFFIE work.

Meanwhile in the kitchen, INDIANA_CHIC is blowing BUBBLES at DARKWOLF. I'm not sure he is happy but he's got the Christmas spirit. Wow what is that sound from the lounge? Itís a SKUNKIEONE playing PIANO with DRTYDAWGs on vocals. It is almost as beautiful as those JUNI FLOWERS, sitting in the window. I think it is time to indulge in BACARDI and get myself in the Christmas MOOD to RUN_A_MUCK with MYBUDDY. Then maybe, DEBBIEDO will be READY_TO clean up!

I almost forgot, on my way over here I was driving my new CHEVY_WHEELS when I got hit by a SPEEDRACER in a MERCEDESBENZ. He ruined the awesome PURPLE paint work I just had done. I BUMPED my head on the DRASHBOARD, and my forehead swelled like a CAMELS HUMP! What a WRECK! I guess you could say I am the LUCKIESTBRAT because I got to spend Christmas with my PINOCHLE family.


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