You have questions; we have answers
DEAR ELITERS: I am a new player on the internet. I don't understand the shorthand people use and don't want to appear rude. Can you help? Dachsienutz
Dear Dachsie: Good question - we all started here once and its easy to forget that it's a completely new language for some. Here are the basics:
gl = good luck; gg = good game (in general it is polite to say win or lose), gh = good hand; lmao = laugh my a** off; wtg = way to go; blnt = better luck next time/tourney; glnr = good luck next round (used for multiple round tourneys); ty= thank you; tyfp= thank you for playing; tyft = thank you for tourney (always a polite thing to say); yvw = you are very welcome.
DEAR ELITERS: I am in a heap of trouble. I met this woman here - 33, beautiful, rich, studied law at Harvard. Her husband treats her terrible. I sent her my picture, but it's not me. I told her I was 27 and an engineer, but I'm only 19 and work at the post office. I think I love her. What do I do now? I want to meet her. Lied through my teeth.
Dear Teeth: Don't be too concerned, you aren't the only liar here. I think you are both playing the wrong game. This is Eliters.com - you are looking for match.com.
DEAR ELITERS: Some TDs give the pairings in the room but use the players' real name - I don't know who Sue or Joe is unless I look at the tourney page. Isn't there supposed to be some standard. Confused
Dear Confused: TDs really should be using Eliter names, but a few months ago Yahoo started banning us for posting lengthy pairings - so since then most of us in Yahoo just type out names and sometimes we use their real names. You are right - we forget how confusing it can be to new players. Just speak up and remind the TD that there are new players in the room. In general though, just keep that tourney page open and keep refreshing it as the tourney progresses.
DEAR ELITERS: I recently gave my phone number to someone I don't know very well. I thought I liked him. Now I find out he is a dog and he still has my phone number. Should I change my name or what? House and heart broken
Dear Broken: If you are premium you are allowed to change your name every two months. First create a new Game Site ID and then change it in Elite to match that via the Change ID function. Next time be more cautious, there are lots of dogs online - some good dogs, some bad dogs. Always err on the side of caution - the internet is not reality. Neutering is also recommended. Oh, and change your phone number.
DEAR ELITERS: I feel really bad. Recently I registered for a silver giveaway tourney but I didn't play because the kids were driving me nuts. Then I found out I won it. I don't need the YEPs. Can I give it away or what do I do? And what if I want to donate a silver what do I do? Bozo in Boston
Dear Bozo: Well - there have been recent changes to the Random Silver Tourneys. It is now possible to win these without being present - but it is also possible to request this be given to another player. Unfortunately, there is a 72-hour time slot for this to occur. Simply email the VP Finance to remove the award and grant it to the selected Player.
If you want to donate a random silver - just send the League HA an email telling them what the occasion is, who you want to host the tourney, what date and time, whether you want to be publicly acknowledged for this generous gesture and whether you want to fund it from your YEP or Dollar account. It takes about 48 hours to make this happen and costs $10 or 6500 YEPS.
DEAR ELITERS: I always vote on the tourney page for player of the month. Does my vote count? Perplexed in Pensacola
Dear Perplexed: Yes. Even if you life in Florida
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