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The Schnozzin Bailout Plan
I am in trouble. I need to be bailed out. I work 40-50 hours a week, pay my bills on time, contribute to charities, but still don't have many luxuries. My vehicle is old as well as my shoes. My house is missing a sidewalk and landscaped very badly. My kitty has no toys to play with so she uses my tattered socks.
My congressman won't help me considering he is working on another bailout for someone else.
So I am asking all Americans 18 years old or over to contribute 1 cent (YES 1 PENNY) from every 10 American taxpayers. With the $200,000 I would receive, I could also help many other bill paying, hard working taxpayers ("hard working" meaning no CEOs from lending companies).
Thank you all for your precious time and 1 penny's worth!
(with thanks to Schnozzin)
The price of love
A farmer had some puppies he needed to sell. He painted a sign advertising the 4 pups. And set about nailing it to a post on the edge of his yard. As he was driving the last nail into the post, he felt a tug on his overalls. He looked down into the eyes of little boy.
'Mister,' he said, 'I want to buy one of your puppies.'
'Well,' said the farmer, as he rubbed the sweat off the back of his neck, 'These puppies come from fine parents and cost a good deal of money.' The boy dropped his head for a moment. Then reaching deep into his pocket, he pulled out a handful of change and held it up to the farmer. 'I've got thirty-nine cents. Is that enough to take a look?' 'Sure,' said the farmer. And with that he let out a whistle. 'Here, Dolly!' he called. Out from the doghouse and down the ramp ran Dolly followed by four little balls of fur.
The little boy pressed his face against the chain link fence. His eyes danced with delight. As the dogs made their way to the fence the little boy noticed something else stirring inside the doghouse.
Slowly another little ball appeared, this one noticeably smaller. Down the ramp it slid. Then in a somewhat awkward manner, the little pup began hobbling toward the others, doing its best to catch up....
'I want that one,' the little boy said, pointing to the runt. The farmer knelt down at the boy's side and said, 'Son, you don't want that puppy. He will never be able to run and play with you like these other dogs would.'
With that the little boy stepped back from the fence, reached down, and began rolling up one leg of his trousers. In doing so he revealed a steel brace running down both sides of his leg attaching itself to a specially made shoe. Looking back up at the farmer, he said, 'You see sir, I don't run too well myself, and he will need someone who understands.' With tears in his eyes, the farmer reached down and picked up the little pup. Holding it carefully he handed it to the little boy.
'How much?' asked the little boy. 'No charge,' answered the farmer, 'There's no charge for love.' The world is full of people who need someone who understands
(with thanks to MoodyRblue)