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Eliters Newsletter
Issue Number 70
December 2008
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Holiday Riddles

~ submitted by DMDesiderata

What do elves learn in school?
Answer: The elf-abet

What is the difference between the Christmas alphabet and the ordinary alphabet?
Answer: The Christmas alphabet has No L (Noel)

What Christmas Carol is a favorite of parents?
Answer: Silent Night

Why does Santa have 3 gardens?
Answer: So he can hoe hoe hoe

What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
Answer: Frosted Flakes (or Snowflakes)

What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
Answer: Frostbite

What kind of bird can write?
Answer: A pen-guin

What did the ghost say to Santa Claus?
Answer: I'll have a boo Christmas without you....

How do sheep in Mexico say Merry Christmas?
Answer: Fleece Navidad!

What does a cat on the beach have in common with Christmas?
Answer: Sandy Claws!

What do you get if Santa goes down the chimney when a fire is lit?
Answer: Crisp Cringle

What kind of candle burns longer, a red candle or a green candle?
Answer: Neither! Candles always burn shorter!

What do you get if you deep fry Santa Claus?
Answer: Crisp Cringle

Why was Santa's little helper depressed?
Answer: He had low elf esteem

What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus?
Answer: Claustrophobic

What do monkeys sing at Christmas?
Answer: Jungle bells, jungle bells...

What do you have in December that you don't have in any other month?
Answer: The letter "D"

Just before Christmas, there was an honest politician, a kind lawyer and Santa Claus travelling in a lift of a very posh hotel. Just before the doors opened they all noticed a $5 bill lying on the floor. Which one picked it up??
Answer: Santa of course, the other two don't exist!

Judge: "What are you charged with?"
Prisoner: "Doing my Christmas shopping early."
Judge: "That's not an offense. How early were you doing this shopping?"
Prisoner: "Before the store opened."

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